Arcadecowboy's roundup
Welcome to part 2 of arcadecowboy's Wilkinson Pretend Internet Football Preseason Roundup (part 1 was called "on the hotseat"). The big idea is to pick one team from each conference to do a preseason writeup. My criteria for picking which team comes down to simply which team's situation interests me the most. For example, I'm less likely to do a team like Texas, unless Texas takes a few hits and looks vulnerable. I'm also less likely to do a team sitting at the bottom of the conference, taking all sim players and only playing sim teams. Enough about that, on to the roundup:
MAC - Eastern Michigan
Coach Knightsaynih enters his sixth season with EMU with the honeymoon phase still in full swing, having turned the Eagles from hapless to conference champion in 3 seasons (now they have plenty of hap). Some critics say it’s because Eastern Michigan targets recruits who can’t tell the difference between EMU and Michigan State, but the fans don’t care as long as they have something to rub in the faces of Western Michigan fans. On to the fun part:
OFFENSE: The Eagles return veteran QB Sr Brandon Mosley. The 3 (soon to be 4) year starter has been a stable force under center for the last two season for the run-first Eagles, and along with two very solid WRs, gives them a viable passing alternative for teams that sell out on the run. On the run side, led by Jr Eric Jackson who ran for 2,704 yards last season, all of last season’s RBs return. All now a little stronger, a little faster, a little more experienced, and joined by 2 redshirt freshmen for even more depth. The big question mark, however, will be the line. The Eagles return only 1 starter, and will likely have to rely on at least 1 freshman. There will be teams with more challenges, but EMU will have their challenge vs stronger D-lines.
DEFENSE: The Eagles only lose 3 starters from a defense gave up 350 ypg last season. While that’s not a lot, the 3 players were key leaders, and it will be a challenge to see how the defense holds vs passing offenses with a lack of depth at LB and DB.
OUTLOOK: Fortunately for the win total (if not for entertainment value), the Eagles face 8 sims, and no teams that finished in the top 25 last season. On second look, no team that finished in the top 40 (shoutout to Rick Dees). EMU is the favorite to win the 3 human MAC and take the championship back from now-sim NIU. Anything less may see the shine start to fade on the honeymoon glow.
BELLWETHER GAME: Week 3 vs Clemson. On paper, it looks like EMU’s toughest opponent.
PREDICTED SEASON: 13-0
PAC-10 - Arizona
For 43 seasons, Coach Deaconsoule has been an institution in the Wilkinson Pac-10, probably a longer tenure than all the other Pac-10 coaches combined. I’m not bothering to do the math, but it feels emotionally true, so we’re going with it. Unfortunately, that tenure is threatening to come to an end after 3 seasons out of the top 40, and the lowest ranking finish since Coach D’s first in office way back in s83. First off, hats off to Coach for scheduling a challenging season in the face of adversity. With only 4 Sims, he’ll need to defeat at least 3 humans to ensure a bowl appearance and (at a minimum) have a chance to win the bowl and keep his job.
OFFENSE: The traditionally balanced Wildcat offense has been trending heavier towards the run the last few seasons, and with the return of both starting RBs and 4 of last season’s OL, the run game should only be stronger in s125. However, if an effort is made to keep things relatively balanced, and to keep defenses from selling out on the run, the Wildcat passing game will need to see marked improvement from s124. Luckily, the pieces are all there for improvement. In addition to returning 4 starting OL, last season’s starter Jr* QB Jonathan Bernard returns under center, as well as two solid Sr WRs in Jose Wright and Charlie McKinney. Improved protection will be key, as last season QB Bernard was harassed for 24 sacks, 17 scrambles, 16 throw aways, and 22 Ints. Overall, only losing 3 starters from last season should only help.
DEFENSE: The Wildcats defense, led by veteran LB Milton Williams, will need to account for significant departures from last season’s defense, losing 3 of their best DBs, including one of the nation’s top DBs in Louis Gregory. Returning only 3 total DBs from last season’s squad, the Wildcats will be forced to rely on 1 or more true freshman, which will be a significant challenge vs even balanced offenses with deep WR corps. A slightly stronger DL and LB corp will be hard pressed to add pressure to try and force mistakes. The Wildcats gave up 344 ypg last season. Expect a bit more in s125.
OUTLOOK: If we were shaking the magic 8 ball, it would probably say “Ask again later.” And then we would ask again later, and it would say “ehhh”, then we would ask again and it would say “go away kid, you’re bothering me with all this pretend internet football stuff.” There are 4 teams on the schedule where Arizona will be clear underdogs. The Wildcats are going to have a chance against all the other human teams, but there are no gimmies.
BELLWETHER GAME: Week 1 vs Colorado State. Coach D is 2-0 vs Coach Chainsaw, newly taking over CSU. That’s a small sample size, but considering Coach C takes over an all sim team (though not horribly recruited sim team), and will likely be playing lots of freshmen, Coach D and Arizona are supposed to win. A loss on this one puts Tucson on red alert, with lots of shaking of the camera and the bridge crew all leaning left, then right, then left again.
PREDICTED SEASON: 8-5, and a 44th season.
SEC - Auburn
Coach Kilgore first ran the Auburn program way back from s49-54. During that time, he took the Tigers to one bowl and lost with a highest end season ranking of #59. Since coming back in s95, Coach K has gotten the WarTigerEagles back on the rails, stringing together 27 straight bowl appearances, and though no SEC titles have been on the books, the Tigers have been very consistent under his steady hand, usually with a final ranking in the 20s or 30s. The boosters have started to get a little restless, envying the prestigious bowls and attention their western neighbors have been getting, with some calling for a new coach to take the reins and take the EagleWarTigers to the next level.
OFFENSE: The traditionally run-heavy Auburn offense lost several key players to graduation, including top RB John Luna, solid QB Paul Higgins, and 3 very highly rated OL. Overall, this will be a much younger offense, especially on the line and under center. The starting QB job will be in the hands of a freshman - either redshirt Paul Howard, or a new recruit coming in. With all of those factors, it’s unlikely the Tigers will avoid a drop in offensive power.
DEFENSE: Auburn returns solid players on the D-line and LB corp. The defensive backfield will be a little weaker, losing 3 seniors, but overall the defense should be stronger than s124. The question will be if it’s strong enough to offset the youth on offense.
OUTLOOK: 5 Sims in Non-conference play bodes well for wins, if not respect in the polls. However, with only 1 Sim in conference play things will toughen up quickly for the Tigers. With 6 wins as gimmies (or should be), and a very embattled Ole Miss on the schedule, 7 wins and a bowl is the minimum bar for Coach K and Auburn. Arkansas and Georgia are also winnable games, but not easy ones. In order to make the fans happy and increase job security, a win against an SEC elite on the schedule would go a loooong way to bringing the administration back in line. It’s not an easy task, but you know a red circle is around the calendar date of 10/5 in pretend internet houses all around the state of Alabama.
PREDICTED SEASON: 9-4.
SUN BELT -
The Sun Belt has a few teams with interesting seasons coming up. Coach “Big Cojones” Dalailama at Army has 4 elites in his Non-Conf, North Texas is trying to 4-peat as champs, Navy and Montana have new coaches… but we’re settling on NMSU, the Las Cruces Loco Aggies. Coach Timberdrive is heading into his 4th season in Las Cruces, finally with a roster fully his own. In his first 3 seasons in the LC, Coach T has been working hard to set up his framework in a challenging, hostile environment, getting the Aggies back into bowl country. However, he’s yet to break the top 60 in the final rankings, and the clock is ticking.
OFFENSE: the Aggies tend to be about a 60/40 run/pass offense, and has a good stockpile of young weapons returning from last season’s 10-4 campaign. Last season’s starting QB So* Nicholas Smith is a quick, mobile QB with good passing skills. While his passing stats weren’t eye popping in s124, and he threw for only 8 TDs to 10 Ints, his ability to gain yardage from broken plays and scrambles gives opposing defenses an extra dimension to account for. QB Smith is joined by a solid cast of skill players in junior WRs Roberts and Potter, returning starting RB So* Joshua Smith, and explosive backup RB Jr* Richard Weir. The OL only loses one starter and is a relatively solid unit. This offense might not have the guns to take down a Stanford or USC, but NMSU doesn’t play Stanford or USC, …so there. Last season the offense averaged 361 yards per game. Fans expect more in s125, and with good reason.
DEFENSE: The entire Aggie defense only had one senior player last season, a lonely DB who stood on the sidelines refilling water bottles and dreaming of putting his geology degree to good use in s125. Last season’s defense gave up 356 ypg. Once again, fans expect an improvement, and they’ll probably get it.
OUTLOOK: Convincing recruits to come to Las Cruces isn’t easy, especially with the Organ Mountains staring the city down like the walls of Mordor, but Coach T has done a good job of tricking solid young talent to give up their hopes and dreams for the promise of desolation and… Sorry, I meant convincing them to come to NMSU, and giving them an opportunity to play, improve, and build a solid, emerging program. The Aggies lost nothing they couldn’t replace from last season’s team, and should be like a Daft Punk song this season: better, stronger, faster. Can they take down reigning Sun Belt champ North Texas? I’m going to take a bold position and say “eh.. maybe.”
BELLWETHER GAME: Hard to pick one, but I’m going to go with week 2 and SMU. Coach Flippen’s Mustangs will be the underdog here, and if the Aggies can’t close this one out, then chances are I should have been meaner in my evaluation.
PREDICTED FINISH: 13-0 (:o)
WAC - Utah
The WAC has the unfortunate distinction of being the last conference in alphabetical order, and thus the one where I am thus most distracted by things like the fan in the window. Nothing personal, WAC. If I do this next season, I’ll (try to remember to) start here to make it up. THAT SAID, Coach 2000champou and Utah had a cinderella season in s124, finishing the regular season 14-0, before falling to Virginia in the Gator Bowl. The Utes were led last season by some very talented seniors, all of whom weren’t allowed to come back for s125, though many of them are still standing at the gates to the practice field, pining.
OFFENSE: I mentioned the sassy seniors, right? Well, gamebreaking RB Michael Peterson, WR Travis Cooper, TE Juan Benson and OL James Schmidt all left to form a country-hiphop parody singing trio (none of them were math majors). With those losses, Utah’s high octane, pass-first, run-never offense is going to be challenged to repeat last season’s 546 ypg. The good news for Utes fans is that both starting QBs return (when you throw that often, you need two). In s124, the dynamic duo shared 97 TDs and only 1 Int between them. The Utes may feel the loss of their gamebreaking skill position players, but a solid and deep corp of RBs and WRs, and a solid returning OL unit will help to alleviate the losses. Overall, the offense may well be as strong as last season, just stronger in different areas.
DEFENSE: The Ute defense gave up a respectable 322 ypg last season. Overall, they’ll be a little weaker than s124, having lost 6 good senior players, but the drop-off should be manageable with an overall stronger LB corp, but slightly weaker DL and DB unit.
OUTLOOK: Repeating s124s success will be a tall order. Not impossible, but the odds are not in Coach 2000s favor. Overall, the team is still strong, just a little less than 124. And Coach 2000 now has to look at that statue of him on the way into the office every day, which has to be unnerving. Especially since they just took the head off the Coach Buffalo Rob statue and replaced it with Coach 2000’s head.
GAME TO WATCH: There are only 5 humans on Utah’s s125 schedule, but every one should be an interesting matchup, so I want to pick all the games. Utah will be a likely underdog in only 2: Pitt and Navy. I’m going to pick week 5 vs Navy and Coach Alphaflight as the GTW. Navy coach Alphaflight, then at the helm of Boise State, defeated 2000champou in 2000’s first season at Utah (s121). This will be Coach 2000’s chance to even the score.
PREDICTED FINISH: 11-2 (and a return to the CC game)
Good luck in the season, fellas!
